This Golden Birthday of Mine

Every day my birthday comes closer. Each day, the thought goes through my head: I am going to be 18 years old in 2 and 1/2 months; a legal adult. I think it used to scare some part of me, actually. But for the past couple of days, I've began realizing that I'm not terrified anymore, which is typical, I guess. I'm sure most adults look back and remember feeling the same anxiousness to just be able to say "I'm an adult."

Now, I know that being 18 doesn't make me 100% an "adult". I do realize this.
I'm just taking advantage of my opportunity to enjoy this golden birthday of mine.

The thoughts of being fully responsible for myself, being in college and living on my own, and all that "good stuff" have been filling my brain lately. I feel young and vibrant and like I can do anything I set my mind to. I hope that some part of me always feels young and vibrant and like I can do anything. It would be a shame to lose that youthful spirit.

I wonder if everyone has these thoughts and feelings in these few months preluding their 18th. I wonder if everyone has at least one "I have my whole life ahead of me" moment inside of them. I hope so. It is truly a wonderful feeling.

I must end my typing session here. I have to go do homework. hahahha (:

Monotonous Thinking

For the past couple of days, I've gone over and over all the picky details of my future college career.
It's almost driving me crazy.

"What major am I going to pursue?"
"Is there a 24 hour gym at my college?"
"Will I be self-disciplined enough to work out every day if there is?"
"I will have a monthly budget for coffee." :)
"Will I be able to get that 30 I need to get more scholarship money?"
"I wonder if I should figure out 'the scholarship thing' myself, or get help from my counselor."
"I can't wait to be on my own, kinda.."
"I'm waiting for that '2 o'clock in the morning-surrounded by papers, books, and coffee-working and studying my butt off'' moment."
"Am I up-to-date on all of my shots?" (haha)
"When I get my allowance next time, I need to send in that application fee with all of the other stuff required (shot records, ACT score, highschool transcript) so I can soon be officially registered at the college."
ETC!

All of these things, and many more, have been going through my brain, being mind-numbingly picked over, and repeating for the a few days; and it's getting harder to sort out how many questions I have-and to remember them all.
AAGGGHHH!!!
*composure, Sarah, keep your composure..

Pray for me, please, lol. Thanks! :)

My Future Career?

As an underclassman in high school, I had my academic future all planned out. I was going to major in Business Administration, getting my MBA (Master's in Bus. Admin.) eventually, and be a "business woman". This plan suited me just fine until my 11th grade year. I had just completed a Psychology course, and was now considering entering the field of Psychology. I had even thought of combining the two and becoming an Industrial Psychologist.. those people who help businesses run smoothly by psycho-analyzing the workers and their environment, etc. It seemed again as though I had it all figured out. But, (Of course there's a "but" right? Decisions like this are never that easy.) I had also been visiting my mom's classroom every day, after I got out of school. She is a para in an autistic classroom at an elementary school, and I begun to help out in the afternoon with the kids. I really enjoyed working with them! So then, I thought about being a special education teacher. But the thought hit me, "Being there for a few minutes every day and being there all day every day are two totally different things", and might not suit me as well as regular education.

So, of course, present day, this very moment, I am completely confused about it all. I never thought I would say this, (the one who loves to have everything planned perfectly before hand) but I think that's ok. I don't think it's mandatory that I have everything figured out right now, because I have more time than just these next few months to figure it all out. I would rather take my time and discover what I have a passion for, than major in something I come to find to be wrong for me and be miserable the rest of college, or my life!

So, I have devised a plan. *evil laugh*
In school this year, I am taking some business courses, as well as a teaching course, and have pretty much eliminated Psychology as a career. (Although, any type of business management or teaching will have psychology involved, so there you go.) Hopefully, by the time I have completed these classes (and graduated!) I will know more specifically what my plans will be.
[[I realize, also, that I have to get the ok from God before I do any of this. I am aware of God's say-so and am not ignoring what he has to say. He has the final "yes" or "no" on anything I am interested in.]]

All of this was brought up because of something that happened in school today. In the teaching class I am in (STAR-Students Reaching and Teaching), I have to submit an application to be in the class, which includes 3 teacher reccomendations. Two of the three filled out the paperwork while I was standing in the room and were thrilled when they knew I was in the STAR program. "If you became a teacher, the world would be a better place." and "I think you would be an excellent teacher; I really do." were the responses I received. I was both flattered and shocked! I could not believe some of the teachers I admire most were giving me such confident remarks towards my decision!

A little background..
My thoughts on becoming a teacher began subtly in junior high school. It crossed my mind, but I dismissed it as a career that made too little money for my interest, and forgot about it. Later, the desire returned in high school, but I was still determined to not pursue it. Now, because of the fact that, over the years, I have had no doubts about teaching, except the salary, I believe it may be God's will. Jesus usually reveals His will slowly, but unchanging, which is what has happened here. But I am still not positive. I am positive that I'm not going to let something stupid like "not making enough money" have such a heavy impact on my decision. I really have no specific direction yet, so in honor of Brother Rick.. "More prayer, more fasting.."

Last First Day of Highschool-Ever.

Today, I experienced my last first day of high school, ever. It was interesting, but successful:

1)I was feeling sick in Principles of Business and had to go to the bathroom. Great first impression, right?

2)My second hour is American History, which is a class I've been dreading since before I was born, basically. But my teacher is hilarious and loves to joke around, so we'll see, I guess. I have always disliked history classes, but hopefully she will change my mind. I am optimistic, though it doesn't sound like it. :)

3)I spent English class in the wrong class, because I wasn't aware that the counselor had already fixed my schedule and replaced the wrong class with the right one. But it's all good.

4)My STAR class requires a lot of supplies, which means $$$. But I trust that God will provide. Otherwise, I'm excited about it. By the end of the year, I will definitely know whether or not I'm interested in this major.

5)I found out today that my Accounting class is valid for college credit. Hooray!

6)PE2 is dumb.

7)I was almost completely lost in Calculus AP, but I think I'm gonna be ok. :)

A memorable last first day, I think.
I'm totally excited about reaching souls. I love the fact that God is using me, and I hope that I continue to be in His perfect will in all things.
I'm also so excited to be a Senior! I can't wait to go to Senior meeting this Monday, just because I belong there.. (because I'm a Senior!)